Reasons men and women communicate differently

But why then are there still so many misunderstandings, grudges and quarrels in our relationships? Or maybe we know but we don’t apply it?

While men focus more on action, women experience everything more emotionally. Some even say that women “think with their hearts.”

A woman should remember that if she does not tell her husband directly about her needs, emotions or expectations, he will not guess them himself. What would be obvious to another woman will not be obvious to your husband. It’s a waste of time.

The common belief that if he really loves me, it means that he knows me well and therefore should know what my desires or fears are, or what I feel at a given moment, is not true. Unfortunately, we have to tell him this.

You can even take on the noble task of teaching your husband about your emotions. But it takes time, patience and pedagogical skills. Otherwise, grievances and complaints arise, and the already tense relationship becomes even more difficult.

In turn, a woman has a need to talk about her feelings (emotive function of communication). Then she expects the man to listen calmly, empathise and show compassion.

This is a difficult art for male nature, but everything can be learned. If the husband does not satisfy this need, the wife will find, for example, a friend or another man – a confidant, and then this may mean the beginning of the end of the relationship.

A wife has the right to expect her husband to be interested and concerned about her affairs, as is the husband in his affairs. It is important for your husband to really learn to listen and not just pretend to listen.

When talking about their affairs, women devote a lot of space to feelings, and men focus mainly on facts (the information function of communication dominates). A woman needs understanding, support, taking care of her feelings, and not at all explaining that her behaviour is not logical, asking about the reasons for crying and proposing a solution – how to best deal with a given problem (and the proposal will be from a man’s point of view anyway, which cannot necessarily be used by a woman at all).

Then the husband cannot be surprised when his wife accuses him of “You don’t understand anything!”

Women, from their point of view, sometimes feel unreconciled with the fact that their husband does not tell everything. They suffer because of this, sometimes they even think that their husband has something to hide, they look for reasons that do not exist and torment themselves about it.

And a man simply does not have as much of a need to “extend himself” as a wife. There is no need to talk about everything and share everything with your wife. Especially when he has problems, he prefers to deal with them himself and wants to spare his wife unnecessary stress. But the wife may interpret such behavioUr incorrectly.

We seem to know all this, but what if we always remember it?

This article was originally published on Onet Woman.